He is an equal opportunity slut.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize