thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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