So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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