Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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