I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
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