I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
He kissed a someone with a penis
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am one with the molecules
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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