i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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