two words: eviction party
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
