Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize