Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
