Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize