38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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