I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
