I'm so fucking centered right now
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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