If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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