I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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