ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
