I hate all girls vehemently.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
