eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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