His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
