So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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