all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
