have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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