I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize