on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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