I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
