This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize