Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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