once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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