My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
