and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
