Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize