Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Found your dick twin last night
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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