So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Randomize
