i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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