Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize