I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
