Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
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