Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
