well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
