tell your sister to shave her snatch
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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