Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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