i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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