Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
