You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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