But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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