I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
