Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
