I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
