why didn't you poke me back
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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