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Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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