Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
